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20121204
20121204
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Search Results 0 to 3 of about 4 (some duplicates have been removed)
Comedy Central
Dec 3, 2012 7:00pm PST
america and is an on-again, off-again affair with him. >> here what i can't figure out. when do they charge their cell phones? they're always on them. always! and they're always full, never plugged into anything. not even in the car. it's always like full bars. dc, beirut, baghdad, great reception. makes the whole thing kind of unbelievable. (laughter) anyway, hi a great thanksgiving. i celebrated the traditional manner with my family or as the indians call them maze. but folks we all know thanksgiving is just a preamble to the holiest day the year, black friday. when americans-- when americans come together to bow before their lord the wal-mart rollback guy. because jesus isn't the only one who is saved. and black friday, because black friday las biblical roots. that's when the three wise men got that killer buy gold and frankincense get one myrrh free, deal. and folks this year was a great one for retailers. >> sales broke records both on-line and in stores. a total of $247 million people shopped. that's a 9% increase over last year's numbers. each shopper spent on average $42
Comedy Central
Dec 3, 2012 11:30pm PST
) >> tonight, ladies and gentlemen, i am calling on all of america's disenfranchised minorities to violently rise up against the white male patriarchy that is keeping you down. it is time to stick it to the man. and i should know, i'm the man. (laughter) i mean look-- look-- look at everything i have. you see this ipad? see this ipad right here, i got it for free. and my free ipad has its own free miniipad which has its own free iphone 5, which has a free nano, which has its own free shuffle. i can afford all this but i don't have to pay for it. doesn't that just make you want to bluferjon me with a chair leg until i burst open like a cash pinata? meanwhile-- (applause) meanwhile down troden, your future prospects are pretty dim. i mean have you heard the coming cuts to public education or food stamps? have you heard about the cuts to medicaid? and folks, let me tell you, the rich just get richer. so really mugging an old couple outside the operahouse is a form of justice. i mean think about it-- (laughter) ultimately all of in is society's fault and i say it's pay back time. you know what m
Search Results 0 to 3 of about 4 (some duplicates have been removed)